Happy Sunday, Chroniclers. You got yer cup? Okay, here's a new one. This episode is about me and a few of my retired buddies. I don't know what it is about retirees, but we love getting together for breakfast and lunch. It's always breakfast and lunch, never dinner. I'm guessing that's because by about 2:30 we're all feeling the need for a nap, and bedtime usually rolls around at about 8:15. I'm not sure if these retiree get-togethers are unique to people from our former prof

It's just another day for retirees Good afternoon, Chroniclers! Got yer mid-afternoon cup? Good. Because we're gonna need caffeine for this one. For the past couple of weeks, the HB and I have been doing our own thing. Now, a lot of working folks might call it a vacation. But when you're retired, it's not really vacation. It's just... Wednesday somewhere else. So let's call it what it was: Time Away. Week One found us in Las Vegas. Week Two found us in Palm Desert. And somewh

Whaddup, Chroniclers? Ya got yer cup? Well, we're out and about. The HB dragged me to Sin City. Actually, "dragged" probably isn't the right word when you're already halfway in the car before she finishes asking. I like Vegas. A lot. For several reasons. Reason Number One: The Godfather I get to visit my godfather. He's my closest living male relative, and unlike most people who get handed a title, this man takes the assignment seriously. When I say seriously, I mean seriousl

What up, Chroniclers? Ya got yer cup? Let's go! I know this may come as a surprise, but apparently I have even more friends. These particular knuckleheads are pilots, motorcycle riders, and generally difficult people to keep track of. Trying to nail these guys down since retirement has been like trying to herd caffeinated cats. First up is Captain Carmen San Diego. Now before you ask, no, that's not his real name. I call him Captain Carmen San Diego because I never know where

Why do I have to wait in line? Don't they know I'm Sam One? Hey Chroniclers... Got yer cup? Okay, let's get it rolling. Of course I've got another Sam One story. You guys know Sam One. He's a little quirky. A little stubborn. A little set in his ways. And by "a little" I mean if they dug up a caveman and gave him a pension, he'd probably be more adaptable than Sam One. This is a man who refuses to change. If flip phones were still king, he'd have three of them. As a matter o

Celebrating this type of birthday can get expensive! In a hurry! What up, Chroniclers? Got yer cup? Let's get after it. Let me introduce you to a few more characters from the never-ending circus that somehow became my friend group. First up is my barber, Damon. Damon has been cutting my hair for about 30 years, and over that time he's been conducting what looks like a one-man westward expansion in reverse. The first time I met him, I'm pretty sure he was cutting hair on a bar

The HB looks so happy! Good morning, Chroniclers. Got yer cup? All right, let's get started. I love telling you about my cast of characters. According to them, they're my friends. According to me, they're more like a traveling circus with retirement benefits. Today's featured character is Vee. Now Vee and I were supposed to be ride-or-die partners. We worked the Hub together. We carpooled. We sat through staff meetings together. And over the years I probably saved his life so

Looks good now, but you should have seen it five hours ago Sunday began the first full week of football, but after the Dodgers game I had a crisis: what do you do after baseball but before football? Apparently the answer was “build a patio cover with The HB while ignoring the instructions.” We bought a fan. A fan that was… let’s say optimistically sized. This thing was so big it could cool the entire neighborhood. Not a problem, though — too big for the patio cover, but the b

First week of football! What up, Chroniclers? Yah, got yer cup? Well, buckle up, buttercup. Let’s go! First off, we'd like to wish our good friends, Mr. & Mrs. Hose Jockey, a happy 37th anniversary. They celebrated the occasion at McDonald's because apparently, according to The Hose Jockey, they pop for half price if you're a first responder. We were going to buy them a fancy anniversary gift, but then we remembered it's Opening Week for football season and I'm still emotiona

Happy parents. Good morning, Chroniclers. Got yer cup? Let's go! Well, Monday was Labor Day. The unofficial end of summer. That means no more white, you fashionless cretins. The Cmdr was trying to determine whether Sunday was the last legal day for his white Crocs or whether he had until midnight Monday. Would somebody please consult the Google Oracle and settle this matter before he files an appeal? Last week was a pretty eventful one around the coffeehouse. We gained a new

It's almost babric to be left without Wi-Fi! What up, chroniclers? You gotcher cup? Okay, let's go. It's starting to become painfully obvious that I'm becoming a grandparent. Show of hands: who has a schedule? I'm not talking to you working stiffs. You folks have to get up at a specific hour so you can punch the clock and keep Mr. Slate from noticing you rolled into the quarry fifteen minutes late. No, I'm talking about us retired folks. The people who proudly say, "I can get

Cigar night at Tenille's Good morning, Chroniclers. How ya feelin'? Got yer cup? Good. You might want to top it off. This one got away from me. It's been an eventful week. Actually, I'm only starting on Friday, and we're already in danger of running long. Tenille invited me and a few of the fellows over for sticks and libation. As you know, I've never once declined a perfectly good opportunity to sit around and solve none of the world's problems. I was the first one to arrive

Feliz cumpleanos, Pablo! Whaddup, Chroniclers? Ya got yer cup? Okay, let's go. You ever wake up and spend half the day trying to remember what you did over the weekend? That's where I'm at. For the life of me, I cannot remember what happened Saturday. At this point, I think my memory is running on Windows 95, and somebody forgot to save the file. Sunday, though? Sunday I remember. Pretty Boy Floyd and Mrs. Floyd were looking at a property in Norco. Nice place. The interesting

This is the status of the Brewhouse after P-P-Pam Pam! Good morning, Chroniclers. Got yer cup? Okay, let's do this. Most of you know that the HB and I are fond of coffee. Not Jeff Chean-level coffee, where every bean has a family tree and a birth certificate, but we do enjoy our java. Unfortunately, someone noticed. That someone was P-P-Pam Pam! I've known P-P-Pam Pam! for nearly 50 years. Fifty years. Half a century. Long enough to know a person's character. Long enough to

The HB and I enjoyong each other and a game. Whaddup, Chroniclers? Got yer cup? Good. Well folks, the weekend's almost here, and tomorrow wraps up the second week of school. That realization hit me this week and reminded me that I needed to check in on my people. When I say "my people," I’m talking about Linda and Chris. They're the folks on the front lines at the local high school, bravely standing between thousands of students, hundreds of Linda is frazzeled parents, and co

What up, Chroniclers? You got yer cup? Okay, let's go. What a week. Great friends, great conversations, and somehow seven days disappeared faster than free pizza at a church potluck. Everybody agreed on one thing: it went by way too fast. It honestly felt like we unpacked on Tuesday and were loading the cars by Wednesday. The week was generously sprinkled with: bike rides dinners out copious amounts of camaraderie a ball game pizza alleged cookies cigars fireside chats that s

Still in San Diego What up, Chroniclers? Got yer cup? Today marks our last full day in San Diego... or Chula Vista... or whatever municipality we've accidentally been vacationing in. At this point, our GPS history looks like an FBI cold case file. The gang has another bike ride planned today. Unlike previous rides, we're hoping this one doesn't require a tetanus shot, police escort, or emergency furniture appraisal from the Doc. A few days ago, we were gathered outside our r

On the Road Again! What up, Chroniclers? Yes sir, it's time for the Chronicles. Everybody got your cup o’Joe? Got your readers so you can actually see your coffee? Alright, let's go. This week, a few of us escaped civilization and headed south for some quality time together. Cmdr McCroc, however, was unconvinced about our route selection. He took the I-15, we took the 5, and somehow this became a matter requiring a full congressional investigation. He grumbled because we didn

Hey Chroniclers, ya got yer cup? Good. You're gonna need it. Well, Sam One was at it again. As you know, Sam One is technologically divergent. Some people don't trust technology. Sam One doesn't trust technology that's already working. Apparently, he didn't trust his phone to properly capture the moment, so he brought along his camera and took the same pictures with that too. Then he had the film developed. After that, he used his phone to take pictures of the pictures he'd t

Yes, it's me. Sam One. What up, Chroniclers? Got yer cup? Let's go. Now before we get into graduation, I need to tell you about Papi Churro's journey into the great State of Texas. As many of you know, Papi encountered a few members of law enforcement along the way. By last count, three contacts total. But apparently once he crossed into Texas, Papi developed a new introduction. The conversation would allegedly go something like this: "Good afternoon, sir. License and registr